Not like this.
(Thank you, Tina Fey. That was a clip from Mean Girls, by the way. Which Tina Fey wrote.)
Obviously, thanks to all the crap I have to put up with, this post is VERY NECESSARY!
There are different reactions when I tell people I’m homeschooled. Some people go all bug-eyed and ask if I get to sleep in. Yes I do. (They go even more bug-eyed.) Usually these people aren’t too bright. Bless them.
Then there are people who decide that they need to take personal control over my education. Because it isn’t good enough. Those people might just be retired biology teachers who do biology labs for 6 students. None of these students go to school. They all follow different curriculums. But, some people think that they need to give us homework. And make us raise our hands. And say something like, “Now, if you go to biology class at school you’re fine, and you might have covered this at home…” Those are the people who make me want to scream.
There are also people who like questioning. And they don’t seem to care what they ask. No, I’m not vegan. I do like chocolate. I wear normal clothes. Yes, I know about [insert random movie star]. No, I don’t walk around in shapeless maxi skirts and weird science t-shirts. Believe it or not, homeschooled girls do wear bras, what your friend told you was wrong. I’m not Amish. Yep, I know how to text. OH MY GOD SHUT UP ALREADY! Those people are harmless, and annoying.
And the people who think I’m socially inept. Yeah, those people. I have had someone say to me, “If I hadn’t met you before you said you were homeschooled I would have thought you were, like, weird.” And he said that totally nicely. It was just an observation. A fact. Those people get this said sarcastically to them, “Hmm, had I not met you before I knew you attended public school, I would have concluded that you were immature, vindictive, and performing behind grade level.” I know it seems nasty. But no one can say I am socially inept.
There are also nice people. Who are sincerely interested (not asking weird questions). I would like to personally thank every one of those people. If you come to my house I will make you cookies. Actually don’t come to my house. I’m sending you virtual cookies.
Ok guys, a few myths cleared here. I do not sit around in my pajamas all day watching movies. I would like to, but I don’t.
I have the motivation to do all my schoolwork without prompting, bribery, or force.
I have friends! I know you doubted it. But it’s true. I also have the ability to make friends. I also have social skills! Wow! (that ‘wow’ was sarcasm)
I can get into college. In fact, my chances of getting accepted into college are TWICE as high as a public school graduate.
I am not homeschooled because I am very religious. I am homeschooled because public school junior high sucked.
I do not want to be a mathematician or a lawyer. Not every homeschooled person wants to be a lawyer. I want to major in drama and playwriting. I want to be an actress and comedy writer. And live in New York City.
I play 3 instruments. And teach myself one of them. (Ok, that was just bragging…)
So, next time you see someone school-age out during school hours, do not say inquisitively, “shouldn’t you be in school?” Instead you should accept that they are probably smarter and more mature than their public school peers.
If anyone ever again says anything nasty about me being homeschooled, I have a speech prepared. And they will have the pleasure of hearing it. (If you want to hear another speech you could always tell me the 5’3 is too short to be an actress…)
Love to you all,